BEST INTERNET CASINO GAMBLING JOKES

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A guy was playing 10-20 holdem and was stuck about 300 dollars when he looked down beside the table and saw a little green leprechuan.

"Quit playing poker forever right now and I'll give you a pot of gold worth a million dollars.", said the little fellow.

The player replied, "Let me get even first."

A blonde was in Vegas vacationing with friends. She was standing in front of the candy machine and put two coins in, turned the knob and a candy bar fell out.

She picked up the candy bar and put it in her pocket, then she proceeded to put two more coins into the slot and turned the knob, again a candy bar fell out and she put it in her pocket.

She put two more coins into the machine and again turned the knob producing yet another candy bar.

A man was watching from a short distance away and walked up to her, he said "Excuse me Miss? What are you doing?"

She said, "Duh! I'm winning here!"

"That rotten husband of mine wanted me to sleep with the landlord because he lost the rent money playing poker," the housewife told a neighbor.

"You didn't do it, did you?"

"I have to admit I did -- though with certain misgivings, I might add. What I haven't done, though, is tell my husband the rent is now paid up for six months!"